Wisdom ( For a cartoonist )

" The art of being wise is the art of knowing what to overlook. "

WILLIAM JAMES

( Like 20,000 rejections from The New Yorker
magazine, H-m-m-m-n ? )

New Yorker reject/ Barron's sale

This is one of those cartoon ideas that you do about once every 10 days that you are POSITIVE will be bought by The New Yorker . . . You are absolutely positive, you can't almost sleep the night that you do it . . that is how excited you get . . at least I get that way because I've been rejected over 19,500 times from the New Yorker . . but I KNOW that some day they will drool over one of these and will NOT be able resist and one of the three gentlemen who makes the decision at The New Yorker will mutter something like . . " Look, let's give the poor bastard a break, before he has a nervous breakdown. Delgado's work IS and SHOULD be in our magazine, I don't care WHAT Pat Byrnes says . . Who the hell does HE think he is ?! - - saying Roy Delgado is not SMART enough to sell our magazine - - actually you don't HAVE to be that smart - - ain't that right, guys ? "

Anyway, it DID get rejected, so I shot it over to Barron's and they bought it quicker than Jeramiah Wright could say G.D America !

I wasn't really surprised though . . Sorry, sometimes it's hard to be humble. But I try, so help me God.

Anyway, I'm having a good time. Remember when Obama went to Warren's church when he was campaigning ? - - I had a nightmare the other night and dreampt ( or ir is it dreamed ) that Obama invited Jeramiah Wright, Joel Osteen, Billy Hargis, Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson for a beer at the White House. Man, I think I'm working too hard . . .

New Yorker Cartoon You'll Never See ( In The NYer )

Here's a cartoon that we KNOW coulda-shoulda-woulda been in the New Yorker IF . . IF . . they woulda BOUGHT it ! . . Of course it woulda been sent as a greyscale drawing . . Woulda been nice in a Sipress rendition . . Or a Crawford style . . or a Cheney . . or a Sam Gross . . or the list goes on and on and on . . even in a soft pencil by P. Byrnes . . ANYBODY . . but Delgado, right ? But actually, what the hell do I know ? . . I'm just another statistic . . another guy who THINKS, ONLY THINKS his stuff belongs in The New Yorker . . The graveyard is FILLED with guys who, THINK, THINK, THINK THAT . . . Why do I torture myself this way ? Why don't I just quit . . . Maybe Pat Byrnes was right . . . Roy Delgado will never sell The New Yorker because he's not SMART enough . . like we are up here, he might be thinking . . We have real smart people up here like Blogojevich, Roland Burris . . the list is endless . . Jesse Jackson Jr. . .. . Bill Ayers . . Jeramiah Wright . . Oh yes . . Barack H. Obama . .

Factoid #6

" Fallacy is an often plausible argument using false or invalid inference. "

Where in the hell was this wisdom before I was sold a bill of goods or ideas many times in my life and why am I just NOW being enlightened . . where the hell have I been ? ? Hel--l-ow . . . Anybody home ? ?

I honestly think that I am just NOW " Getting it " . . .

It's a little like the story of my life . . A day late and a dollar short . . but, hey, I'm not complaining, I know how to adapt . . like the great Niccolo Machiavelli taught, you MUST have the wisdom and skill and knowledge and willingness to adapt to what is confronting you, if you desire to succeed.

Like a guy that used to work for me by the name of Buck Boswell, he was a gambling racetrack-addicted talented journeyman signpainter, high school dropout, but one helluva competent truck lettering man . . He worked for me for 26 years . . and I learned and remembered this one observation that he had made about being a successful businessman, which was a 100% "truism" and has stuck in my mind for its marvelous truth.

The remark was always uttered made many times when we dicussed what was the main reason for the 95% failure rate of a new budding sign company which almost always collapsed, whether it was in a few weeks, or a few months or a few years . . these companies could never really figure out WHY they failed . . . most of them would say " I'm pretty good . . " . . " I can't figure it out " . .

Of course there can be and there are usually a miltitude of reasons of why they failed, BUT, BUT . . . This is the gem he would always utter . . ( Since he was one of the best in his field and so was yours truly, and we knew it, and THAT was why we were succeeding . . ) This was the gem that was not known by all of the " failures ".

Buck would utter:

" You don't know how good you have to be to know how bad you really are. "

Kind of reminds me what the great guru of many successful businessmen, Earl Nightingale said. He would advise for everyone to endeavor and strive and to become the top 5% in your field. Because if you DO, you would always have a job . . even during the Great Depression of the 30's . . . they STILL needed janitors, bricklayers, painters, signpainters or whatever trade you are in . . . These top 5% kept their jobs because their services were still needed . . . ie: not EVERYONE got layed off !

As everyone knows, of course there is always someone better than you . . . ( except maybe Mohammad Ali, right ? )

You can measure how much a machine is capable of producing, like a bricklaying machine, etc . . . but you cannot measure and do not know what a human being is able to create and you don't know how good you can become.

I say . . " GO FOR IT ! "

When we got to this place called " LIFE " . . I believe that we all have access to a " Storehouse of Abundance " which actually exists . . it is there . . ( Remember, Seek and ye shall find . . . knock and it shall be opened unto you . ) and you can choose to get all you want, and you can go to this "Storehouse" with a sieve or a teaspoon . . or like some people, come with a steamshovel . . because life doesn't CARE what you get . . you get what you got, because that is what you expected to get.

Things that you " want " from this Storehouse of Abundance can be either tangible OR intangible . . things to HAVE, or things to BE . .

Some people have a problem with trying to " make " a lot of money . . The good news is that you can GIVE it away ! ( End of problem )

Some people don't expect much . . and ' Life " kindly obliges.

Life is a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Most people say: " I'll believe it when I SEE it. "

Unfortunately, like Dr. Wayne Dyer teaches . . they got it backwards . .

" See it and you will BELIEVE it ! "

Nuf sed.

It

Bob Mankoff on You Tube

I do enthusiastically recommend the You Tube pod cast interview: Authors@GoogleBobMankoff, it is entertaining and you can learn something valuable from it. The podcast explains why we laugh, and he does it in a very intelligent way. All in all, I would give it the full five stars.

One phrase really puzzled me, though, when he said " There IS such a thing as a GOOD bad drawing. "
( Although it is an oxymoron, it is understanding of why he had to say this to defend the magazine's policy to publish the inferior artists that abound in the magazine ) After all, this is the main complaint they get from the public, and by saying this, it explains it possibly as well as anyone could explain it. This gives him all the qualifications to run for a political office, a wonderful slick good silver tongue, smart, educated and can explain things clearly, very clearly.

If that is true, then, there is such a thing as a GOOD bad cooking, a GOOD bad movie, a GOOD bad You Tube Interview, A GOOD bad line of Bullcrap, A GOOD bad joke . . and if so, is there also such a thing as a BAD good drawing, BAD good cooking, BAD good movie, BAD good You Tube interview, a BAD good line of Bullcrap . . ad infinitum.

Maybe I have a GOOD bad blog . . or a BAD good blog ? What is BAD, WHAT is GOOD ? WHAT is VIRTUE ? VIRTUE ? Back to Socrates, I guess . . where I started.

That explains everything. Now it all makes sense. Now I see it! Now he just made it crystal clear ! All of a sudden I understand Picasso's woman and a mirror, I can understand The impossible Trident , quantum physics, pie are square, cake are round ! Cheese, it was there all the time . . It's not you . . it's ME ! I'm sorry . . I apologize.

On the PLUS side, I'm reminded of the old adage: " Those who know how, will always have a job - - - and those who know WHY, will always be their boss. "

nuf sed.

Dis and Dat -

As I've commented in the past, you meet the nicest people in this business just like in any business, BUT, just like in EVERY business, as in life, there are always those few, those opiniated arrogant few people who assume they are an authority and actually BELIEVE their opinion counts ( MORE ). - - -

These are the bitter mean-spirited small percentage of misguided , smirking, flippant, derisive irrational morons, who, I think, actually BELIEVE they are being helpful and never have a nice thing to say about another person and who disguise their inferiority complex with a superiority complex and actually, honestly, BELIEVE their few press clippings ( That COULD be the problem ).

Someone, ( Besides SEINFELD ) once said " Living well is the best revenge. "

And I love what George Carlin used to say: " You ugly people know who you are. "

Enough negativity - - if the shoe fits, wear it. ( But try to stay under your rock )

THEN, today I get the an email from one of the good guys, The well-known cartoonist, JONNY HAWKINS. I've seen this guy's drawings around for a long time myself.

He says " Hi Roy, I've enjoyed your great cartoons over the years in an avalanche of publications ( I hope nobody was hurt ).

Just wanted to stop in and say , " Keep thinking and inking - your work has left a mark. " . . . have been cartooning for 23 years ( The last 19 years full-time ).

It's a crazy, unpredictable, rebellious living. I love it . . . except when it absolutely refuses to be loved.

Cheers - Jonny Hawkins
Sherwood MI

I wish Jonny continued success.

New Yorker Magazine cartoon satire

This cartoon was published on the cover of PROtooner cartoonists trade journal and on the cover The Gag Recap AND on the cover of my book of cartoons: " A Funny thing happened on the way to The New Yorker ". ( Broken up in a staccato chopped up blocky design version )

It seems to me, although I've been known to be naive, that The New Yorker SHOULD come out with a book of cartoons with this title. Humility has its virtue, I think ( KNOW ) MOST people take themselves too seriously. If you ask ANY competent psychiatrist or get a CONSENSUS of psychiatrists opinions: they will overwhelmingly agree that it is not wise to take oneself too seriously - - - HOWEVER, you should take your WORK seriously.

Does Mankoff look at this blog ? Probably not, but he SHOULD look at this blog - - Look at me when I'm talkin' to you - - A lot of the stuff you see here could be substituted for some of the cartoons in many issues of the magazine and no one would know the difference, and many times IMPROVE the issue - - - but not only MY material, - - I could easily mention a half-dozen or so cartoonists whose work SHOULD be in The New Yorker - - - Like just a few - - Mike Lynch, Dan Reynolds, Marty Murphy, Scott Masear, Harley Schwadron, Eli Stein, Donna Barstow - - this short list rolled out of my lips without even trying - - and there are MORE .

Wisdom ( Write this one down )

" Socrates is a joke played on us by the Gods. "

Professor Michael Segrue
Princeton University

This I Know . . ( or do I ? )

When one looks at so-called "good " ( ? ) magazine cartooning as The New Yorker Magazine purports to exercise . . . You look at some of the newer cartoonists there . . of the last 20 years or so, ( not all, but you know who you are, the ones that irritate most readers and other cartoonists, especially the ones who can't sell there ) . . . . A student of art can't help but bring to mind the famous statement by Josef Albers ( 1888-1976 ), the German-born American artist, was called an artistic adventurer in 20th century modernism.
His famous statement: " ART IS A SWINDLE. " I think was the truth. He was engaging in it and was benefitting immensely. I think he was trying to tell us something. He was an honest man.
His Socratic-like honesty is admirable. Sometimes what you think something is, it turns out to be just what you thought it was. ( But were afraid to say, because you might be tagged as unsophisticated . . and for God's sake, who would relish THAT ? ).

The odd thing, to me, is that the writing of the cartoons in The New Yorker is fine. But a lot of the ones almost nobody likes are drawn by writers . . Hell, no wonder the drawings stink . . It's like hiring a housepainter to fix your plumbing problems . . most housepainters are lousy plumbers. Most writers are lousy cartoonists. Most atomic physicists are lousy tight-rope walkers . . . IT'S NOT THAT COMPLICATED !

Actually, the writing is usually so good that you don't need ANY drawing at all !

Many are just illustrated jokes, They could be displayed similar to a section that used to run in past Reader's Digest magazines called " Cartoon Quips ". . . What they did, was described the scene and then give you the "gagline ". Hell, the same thing could be done at The New Yorker . . Who wants to look at a repulsive or stupid or amateur drawing or painting ( Unless, like Albers informed and enlightened us about the swindle ). I just like to know ahead of time I'm in the middle of a swindle and I'm getting the shaft or the short end of the stick .

Sometimes, the truth hurts ( Some people ) . . And as Jack Nicholson told Tom Cruise, in " A Few Good Men " : " You can't HANDLE the truth ! " ( Some people can't. )

As Lew Card used to say: " Nuf sed. "

AT LEAST ALBERS TOLD US UP FRONT.

Medical Economics Cartoon

Here's a drawing that appeared on page 81 of the 2006 issue of MEDICAL ECONOMICS in a department in the back of the magazine called LAST LAUGH. Dave Carpenter, Harley Schwadron and another cartoonist whose signature you can't read . . something like ALDRIDGL were also featured. ( You wonder, why would someone sign a piece of art with a signature you can't read ? The ONLY way that makes any sense IS: If you get VERY,VERY famous, it doesn't matter what your signature looks like or whether you can read it or not . . in fact it becomes a conversation point and perhaps an allurement. (?) Actually, there are no rules for this . In fact, if I was so smart and so knowledgeable I'd be higher up and probably more successful in this business . . it's just my humble opinion.

On Arguing

" Any clod can have facts, but having opinions is an art. "

- Charles McCabe


Reasoning, tested by doubt, is argumentation. We do it, hear it and judge it every day. We do it in our own minds, and we do it with others. What is effective reasoning ? And how can it be done persuasively ? These questions have been asked for a thousand years.

I was having a friendly argument years ago with a friend, and no matter what I said was like talking to a brick wall . . simply because that person had already made up his mind and had a rebuttal BEFORE I made the statement yet to be uttered. It was that moment I remembered what someone almost told me ( by his actions ): " DON'T CONFUSE ME WITH THE FACTS. "

What I learned from this and from a couple of seminars I attended when I had my business, was . . you must make sure that the person you are arguing with is in a RECEPTIVE mode at the time you are presenting your side. Otherwise it is fruitless.

It's good to remember that argumentation is mostly a social and cooperative enterprise by which we find truth and resolve conflict.

Turkey Soup for the Soul

Recently, a pretty good writer that I know sent me an email saying that things were bleak, because his writing was not producing the results he was expecting and was entertaining the thought of maybe hanging it up. . . (or at least, that was the'gist ' 0f it. ) He told me that maybe he needed a little pep talk about now and wanted me to tell him something that might help. I thought for a while and sent the following email reply to him:

It is no doubt a tough business. It is a HARD business . . but it's not TOO hard. No one ever said it was going to be easy. Then I gave him one of my favorite " Gold Nuggets " :

" The successful man lengthens his stride when he discovers the signpost has deceived him; the failure looks for a place to sit down. " ( J.R. Rogers )


The most important thing, I think, people fail to realize is that ( in my case ) I draw because I HAVE to draw, and I have to draw because I WANT to draw . . . . even if there was no such thing as money . . I would STILL be drawing !

I have a PASSION for drawing . . I have my eyes firmly fixed on the prize . . . you must want it so bad you can TASTE it . . you are willing to work for free . . walk on glass . . you must go after what you want with the trenchant zeal of a crusader . . . IF YOU CAN SAY " YES " to the above, then you have what it takes . . If you have to think about it or hesitate in any way, then, I can't help you any more.

I think my United States Marine Corps training helped.

I like the latest Marine Corps recruiting commercial . . " We're not taking applications, we're looking for COMMITMENTS. " Then I said, I don't know if any of this helps . . I've tried to be honest . . but all of this is my quick 'take' on the subject. . . I can only tell you what works for me.

Respectfully, Your collegue and friend, Roy Delgado

Mike Lynch's Blog Tool Poll

Hey Mike, I just ran across your poll about the different tools various cartoonists prefer in drawing their cartoons . . at first, I thought it was legit till I saw the toothpick dipped in ink
as choice . I thought it was hilarious at first, and thought you were trying to be funny,
then I thought of the cartoonist whose name sounds like the tree: Cyprus, but has a different spelling. Homonyms, Synonyms, Antonyms . . Bah . . I never did get it clear . . .

Anyway, I like to separate good drawing and good writing . In the case of Cyprus, the New Yorker Cartoonist . . I truly envy him, I think he's one of the best in the genre of the material the New Yorker likes. I personally think he would be even better and bigger and more popular if his drawing was better. The proof is simple . . why do you think Universal Press ( It was their idea ) hired someone else to draw Doonesbury ? . . and Boondocks . . and The Far Side book Covers ? NUF SED.

The same could be said about Mankoff's style and Roz Chast's style and a half-dozen or more New Yorker cartoonists. They're ALL GREAT . . but they could be GREATER ! The same thing could be said about Li'l Abner . . . . Frank Frazetta drew Li'l Abner and Daisey Mae like the way Al Capp WISHED he could draw them.