Wisdom ( Write this one down )

I love this cartoon, one of my favorites. Recently sold to Haymarket Media, a conglomerate in NYC who publishes a bunch of Medical Journals. I like the philosophical message in it. You people out there know what he's talking about, H-M-M-M ?



I once saw a sign on a wall in the 60's . . it said: " You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough ! "


And then, there's this: A message typed on a piece of typewriter paper someone once sent me several years ago . . .

" Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in hand, wine in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming . . . DAMN, WHAT A RIDE ! " ( Kind of reminds me of the late HUNTER THOMPSON )

In my humble opinion, this cartoon SHOULD have been in The New Yorker. I believe it is THEIR loss, not mine. Ask ANY New Yorker cartoonist.

New Woman's World Cartoon

This drawing appears on page 55 of the magazine on the newstands now. The color is executed expertly by their staff.

Wisdom/Truth

" Have success and there will always be fools to say that you have talent. "

- EDOUARD PAILLERON

Playboy rough - Cartoon of the day

Here's a rough just off the drawing board that will go to Playboy . . so you get a peek . . I usually put in SOME color to give the idea a little needed kick, since The Hef already knows from other stuff you've done for him, he knows you can handle color . . He would then ask for a finish, where I would complete the color rendering and mail the finish on heavy matte photo paper or on a disk to New York, then they coordinate with the west-coast offices.

I usually use a rough pencil first, then it goes on the light table, make corrections and improvements and then usually goes on the light table again, . . the finished rough is executed usually with a Micron pen.
Then it's scanned, cleaned up, throw in a little color with my PaintShopPro9 program and print it, usually reduced to about 88% of the original.

I'm assuming this will be a reject, or I wouldn't be showing it here . . . It sounds stupid, I know . . but I've never said I was a smart guy . . if he buys this one, I'll never do it again . . . LIVE DANGEROUSLY , ( Sounds more like ' Not too Smart ' , instead of ' Dangerously '. . . . Maybe Pat Byrnes was right when he said I wasn't too smart . . . )

Cartoon of the Day

Things you need to know

" Your marriage is in trouble if your wife says, " You're only interested in ONE thing, " and you can't remember what it is. "

- MILTON BERLE

Wisdom/Truth

" Most people don't know what they're doing, and a lot of them are really good at it. "

GEORGE CARLIN

Tough going

" The people I really feel sorry for are Arab-Americans who sincerely want to get into CROP
DUSTING. "

- BRIAN REGAN

New Classy Playboy Christmas Card

Here's a beautiful card designed by the Chicago award-winning graphic designer LEN WILLIS.

For those who are not aware of Len's work ( I suggest to google him up ) . . His work has garnered him many prestigious awards by his peers and industry.

He is probably one of the top five graphic designers in the country.

Note the flourish on the ' y ' in ' Holidays ' ending up to become a smile on the famous bunny's mouth ! . . AWESOME !

New Biker Cartoon

This drawing appears in the February issue of BIKER magazine ( a sister publication of EASYRIDERS ) on page 14.

This is a second in a series of cartoons that BELONG in The New Yorker Magazine ( in my humble opinion ).

Ask ANY New Yorker cartoonist, except Bob Mankoff or Pat Byrnes or David Remnick or Jacob Lewis or 38 other New Yorker cartoonists that I don't have the space to mention . Go ahead. Gawd . . sometimes it's HARD to be humble . . GAWD !

Three SAT EVE POST Cartoons - Jan/Feb '09 issue

Here are three new cartoons now appearing in the new January-February issue of this old magazine Benjamin Franklin started way back.

I was quite surprised to find three of mine all in one issue. If someone would have told me in '53-54 ( when I was 18 ) while attending Billy Hon's Cartoon School in Los Angeles that someday I'll have three cartoons in one issue of The Saturday Evening Post, I would have assumed he was under the influence of loco-weed or firewater ( or both ).

The New Yorker Magazine continues to behave like a frigid woman as she still does not warm up to me after 19,000 rejections . . and still counting. ( Actually, it's not my problem, I believe it is them that are losing out by not publishing my work ).

I guess I'm in good company, as Lee Lorenz once told me ( not selling to The New Yorker ), one of the nicest guys in the business.

It took 50 years, almost to the day, to sell Playboy. I'd sent the first batch to Playboy while in the Marines and stationed on Okinawa in 1957, and on and off on intermittenly I'd try and try again to hit the slick 'girlie' mag, with no avail. People would say, why are so you obsessed with trying to sell Playboy and The New Yorker ?

Bill Cosby's mother scolded him many times as a young man and would harshly admonish him by saying ' Why do you always have to try to be funny ?

Thomas Edison, when asked by a reporter why, after all of these years and thousands of failures in his attempt to invent the light bulb . . ' Why are you obsessed, why don't you just quit ? '

He replied confidently, ' Oh no, not now ! . . Now I know 10,000 things that DON'T work ! '

On January, 2001, the Brit George Leigh Mallory while on his way to climb Mt. Everest, was asked by a reporter : ' Why do you want to climb Mt. Everest ? ' . . His famous reply: ' Because it is there. '

Goals should be personal, worthwhile and challenging. It must be YOUR own goal . . if it's YOUR goal to be or to do, and it is challenging and meaningful, and worthwhile . . GO FOR IT !

FOLLOW, LEAD, or GET OUT OF THE WAY.

Good advice

" Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight. "

PHYLIS DILLER

Things maybe you'd like to know

" The older I get, the simpler the definition of maturity seems: It's the length of time between when I realize someone is a jackass and when I tell them they're one. "

- BRETT BUTLER

New Yorker Cartoon Satire ( Should be, but probably won't )

This is the first in a series of cartoons, that if I was in Mr. Mankoff's shoes would pick to be thrown into the pile which would begin the process to be eventually chosen as a 'yes' by the other two judges, Mr. Jacob Lewis and Mr. David Remnick of The New Yorker Magazine.
It is timely, in good taste, smart, and a perfect fit into the next issue. A perfect fit, indeed.
The late Jerry Marcus told me when Lee Lorenz bought the famous cartoon by Jerry depicting the famous Russian Tea Room Restaurant Exterior with a sign in the window reading " Under New Management " . . . The cartoon was so timely because The Soviet Union had just collapsed two weeks prior after 75 years of Communism . . The cartoon was purchased on a Friday and the cartoon appeared in publication a week later . . . I think they leave a spot or two figured for the possibility of a very timely cartoon that is purchased at the last minute and then they make a last minute switch . . . much easier to do since we came into the digital electronic age.
Lee asked Jerry if he would come into the city and rework the drawing so the venue would be more authentic, ( The New Yorker being famous for inspecting each drawing for authenticity when important ) Lee had sent someone out and took a few polaroid shots to work from. Jerry took the train in to The New Yorker offices where Lee had a drawing board set up ready for Jerry to work on. There was an extra $75.00 extra for Jerry also.

Things you ought to know

" My father wore the pants in my family . . at least after the court order. "

VERNON CHAPMAN

Cartoon of the Month

This guy is an incurable optimist, kind of people I like to be around, I was going to say " hang around with" . . . I've always liked the people who see the glass half full, rather than the pessimist who always sees the glass half empty . . then, there are the the morons who don't even see the glass !

Wisdom ( Write this one down )

" Honesty is the key to a
relationship, If you can
fake that, you're in. "

RICHARD JENI

New Yorker Satire Cover

Here's a cover that if you DID see it on the newsstand, you'd probably say hey a nice cartoon cover . . looks like a New Yorker cover, interesting, got my attention, who the hell IS this guy ? . . I never saw HIM before in ' The New Yorker ' . . .
Am I biased, YES, I did it.

Cartoon of the Day

You wonder, is anybody at The New Yorker looking at any of this stuff ? Should they be looking at this stuff ? Would they look at this stuff ? Could they look at this stuff ? Maybe. just maybe, they ought to look at this stuff.

( Shoulda - woulda - coulda )

The best excuse I like from a loser is: " If only I'dna."

This is what happens with too much Socrates and Plato at one time . . Let's go back to The Ionian Physics.

Cartoon of the Month

Every time I jump into a cab ( especially if I'm in a hurry and it's going on 2:30 pm ) and I'm in NYC, I worry that this might happen . .

Bank scheme nailed

" My old man was so dumb. He worked in a bank . .
they caught him stealing pens. "

RODNEY DANGERFIELD

Recent Woman's World Cartoon

Here's a recent cartoon someone clipped and mailed to me. Much appreciated.

FACTOID #1 ( Things you need to know )

" Studies show that 80% of the population suffers from depression and the other 20% of you cause it. "

DANA EAGLE

Bumper Sticker Just Seen

Just saw this bumper sticker here in Petersburg, West Virginia . . This big burly hillbilly trucker-type guy was pulling out of the local Dairy Queen and was driving an old red Ford pick-up truck ( with a gun rack ). The sticker, was a little larger than usual, with a red background and large white Futura bold italic letters, it read . .

" I'll keep my guns . . You can
keep your ' CHANGE '
bumper sticker. "

New National Law Journal Cartoon

This drawing appears on page 23 of the latest ( November 17, 2008 ) issue of this barrister's rag.

New Harvard Business Review Cartoon

This drawing appears on page 18 in the December issue of the magazine. Dan Reynolds and Paul Kales were also featured on this page with their fine drawing styles.

New Harvard Business Review Cartoon

This cartoon appears on page 109 as a half-page in the November 2008 issue.

Little Known Fact:

" COLLEGE: A fountain of knowledge
where all go to drink. "

- HENNY YOUNGMAN

Good advice from Lincoln

" You cannot build character and
courage by taking away man's
initiative and independence. "

ABRAHAM LINCOLN

Cartoon of the Day

Cartoon of the Day

HAPPINESS

" Someone has well said,
" Success is a journey, not a destination. "
Happiness is to be found along the way,
not at the end of the road. "

ROBERT R. UPDEGRAFF

Cartoon of the Day

AMBITION

" Experience shows that success is due less to ability than to zeal. The winner is he who gives himself to his work, body and soul. "

CHARLES BUXTON

Cartoon of the Month

Cartoon of the week

Cartoon of the Month

I like gags and cartoons about street hot dog vendors, Chili dog stands,
hash houses, chili parlors, cheap restaurants, old small restaurants with ex-G.I. short-order cooks, I also like gourmet restaurants, 5-star french restaurants and good steak houses . . . I guess you can tell I like food. ( Of course with a Gran Marnier, A double Scotch-on the rocks, followed by a glass of ice water and a cup of good coffee. )